i think.

that im personally getting better at rcognizing who i am. im starting to push people away for realizing who they really are and that they are not my real friends. ive been thinking that i want to go back to va because thats where my true happiness is. so when i get to that point i will let you know. on a nother note, sorry i havent been blogging, i will get some new stuff up here soon. oh yeah have yall been realizing that since your getting older, people think you get dumber, haha. maybe its just me. whadafck? since when i alexis santiago dumb. anyway i just wanted to say dt. and if anyone felt like that applied to them, it probably did so leave. other than that, im done for today, bye everyone.

and.

Im Laughing At The Fact That You Want Me To Keep In Touch With You.

So..My Summer Has Been Absolutely Awesome. I Just Wanted To Let Yall Know That. And, Im Ready For The Summer To End Honestly. So I Can Focus On More Important Things I Need In Life, And Not You. =) Im Happy Now. And Now I Want Some Dairy Queen.


Goodbye Loves.

im.DONE

" THIS IS GONNA BE A SHOCKER."

But, im over you, and all the stressing over you. haha i feel good. IM MOVING ON. Maybe in the future you will realize that i didnt mean to hurt you, but i cant keep waiting on your call. I have lots to experience and, you, my dear, are not making it easy. So simply put, since you wont walk out of my life, im walking out of yours. We can still be best friends, nothing more, nothing less. bye.

NOW THAT TOOK ALOT OF COURAGE AND TIME, BUT IM READY FOR THIS CHANGE.

Now Alexis Santiago still loves you, but is no longer in love with you. No more. And Im happy to say that now.

• Time to get someone who truly cares for me.
• Time to get someone who listens.
• Time to have fun.
• Get drunk (joking)
• And have a nice life.

p.s. Imma strong Puppie :)

The Thought Of Living...

WITHOUT YOU??????!!!???

well that just cant be true. i thought you said we would be together forever..what happened to that? theres not A SINGLE DAY that passes and your not on my mind. it seems that you lead me on, and i fall for it, knowing that it would be IMPOSSIBLE for us to be back together. i love you more than i love myself sometimes and its stupid of me to say but yeah its true. i would do anything for you, and the hardest part of this "thing" is letting you go. im trying, but everytime i do, you keep coming back into my life. i try to push you away, but its too hard. Sometimes i wonder why things happened the way they did, and why did i fall for you so hard. i guess those will never be answered. no matter what, even if i let you go, i will continue to love you dearly.

ThisIsFromDEEP. ThisIsWhatsSeen. 2

THIS IS FROM DEEP.

This is from deep. The way i actually feel is as if i am UNWANTED. I feel like sometimes you say certain things to make me happy and in the end, its just ONE.BIG.LETDOWN...Why do you tell me things you dont mean, be honest,i promise i wont shed a tear (infront) of you. I feel like sometimes, you make me feel like the world, and then when everything goes good, it messes up. I feel like when im around you, you push me away..CONSTANTLY..and honestly im getting fed up with the bull. I dont need to be constantly hurt by someone like you, the someone who was the closest to me. You are making me sick, slowly but surely.

THIS IS WHATS SEEN.

This is whats seen. To everyone else, i seem like a hastle, a problem. my "attitude" is bad. and no one wants me around. To everyone else it seems like we have this perfect relationship, and honestly im getting fed up with walking through the streets telling everyone how "happy" we are. Gosh, everyone else thinks that im the bad child or person..haha...im not. LOOK CLOSER. things are not always what they seem. If thats how people want to see it, so be it.